grief

six haikus on grief

your quiet sorrow
wakes me from the winter night
to sit by your side

a drink to warm you
a friend to hear every word
my arms to rest in

kiss the pain goodbye
watch it board the westbound train
are you lonely now?

these are the phantoms
fingers around our ankles
demons rising up

offer up your skin
a sacrifice to the grief
but keep your heart close

i will cry your tears
let your agony scar me
together, we mourn

December 2, 2022 haiku

healers

last night
the sky was a vivid blue
the air dry and cold
evening brought a frigid clarity
creeping it’s way down
between the layers
through my skin
into whatever form a soul takes

i’ve always thought of my soul
taking the form of autumn
brilliant colors painting a landscape
a backdrop to fires and hikes
to deep breaths of fresh air

we write poems about the leaves
floating to the ground
on a fall day
but the leaves don’t fall together
each leaf falls alone
has no-one to lift it up
fix it to a branch
offer it one more season

and this is how the cold
brings it’s clarity
chilling any half-truths away
those leaves were so loved
when they offered their display
their choreographed colors
but the loneliness of death
makes life seem a false beauty

when my leaf falls
i hope you’ll be there
to watch that gentle glide down
to see me rest softly on the earth
and, maybe, to pick me up

your hands have always been healers
and my soul, always in need of healing

December 1, 2022

a toast to our sins

the waking light
paints folds in the linen
curtains, intended to keep out the day
but he meanders easily through
asks us to return to life
somewhere between here
and there
is a better reality
one where gentleness
can’t expire
where my hand never leaves yours

my waking thoughts
gather all our choices in the pool
water, there for the birds to bathe
but they drink instead
swallow the past down
one gulp
at a time
a toast to our sins
to our forgiveness
to every fork in every road

November 23, 2022

worlds and wants

this sloppy city energy
is spilt on the sidewalk
dripping down city hall

i am closing all my senses
moving through the dark felt sky
a meditation on your body
fuels my flight

it is there, submerged in the stillness
that i remember why i chose you

the miles can’t restrain my pulse
when every thought
turns to the shape of you
every intention
moves us toward the edge
the blurred space
between here and there
between worlds and wants

my world
i want
you

November 10, 2022

shadows

when i closed my eyes to fall asleep
i saw you in the firelight
a shaw around your shoulders
content with a cool breeze
if the flames promised to warm you

the shadows touched your face
as i have, many times before
in moments of intimacy
in seasons of despair

and i felt foolish
to be jealous of the absence of light

November 5, 2022

reassemble

pull the thread
that holds me together
take me apart without mercy

if only so that you can gently reassemble
what has been undone

October 25, 2022