i can hear the announcement
the rain telling us she’s here
open up your chest
let’s wash the years away
follow the flow
to the low point
on knees, head bowed
just one breathe
from the end but you take it
for me
inhale the life
exhale the rest
it will all rinse free
was that the beat of my heart
or a tremor in my bones?
a glimpse of real love
or the fear of being alone?
i watched the rain
collect on the trim of the taxi window
not cold enough for snow
but much too brittle to enjoy
and somehow, you warmed the moments
all smiles and big city energy
ready for the view
like i’m ready for you
to find me
under the cloud cover
to tell me
“maybe it will be ok”
to see me
as i am
and still
stand beside me
notice the single petal
of a flower pulled
from the patch near
the cloud shaped stones
we found it
pointing at the
saltwater sentience
“it is alive”
we muttered beneath
each fragrant breath
all the air in our lungs
drug over this one
remaining
petal
and if you agree
we get to have that
most alive thing between us
the breathing, heavy, real connection
truth and greed
i’ll take you when i need you
you can have me always
all ways
now
it was there for us
singularly
under the old tree
a representation of everything
possible
when i close my eyes
i see you in the darkness
how the muscles
gently shift your skin
when you try not to smile
how your hair
grabs hold of everything
with any subtle movement
i see your joy
when i arrive with flowers
and your contentment
when we have an evening ahead
with nothing but time to talk
i see your excitement
as we’re planning a trip
to the city or the country
or anywhere in between
and i see you fidget
when you’ve been sitting still
for far too long
at times i see your sadness
when the loneliness creeps in
or the ones you love
aren’t so loving in return
and i see your strength
in consistency and discipline
in each step forward
when you’re overwhelmed with grief
when i close my eyes
i am drowned in gratitude
for having you by my side
the most beautiful woman
i’ve ever known
i am always afraid i’m dreaming
in awe that we found each other
at the right moment
in the perfect light
i constantly think
of our first conversation
with such amazement
feeling the connection
we stumbled upon
and work so hard
each day to build
when i close my eyes
and confront the me no one else can see
i have a clean conscience
inside, i am an infinite well of love
and there is no one but you
i will allow in
enter through the back gate
near the garden with the winter greens
there, we choose each other
a knee to the ground
will you have me?
a ring on your finger
and whispers of forever
everyone is paused
expecting answers
when answers are all we’re missing
their eyes follow us
eerie paintings in the hall
i’ll grab the cloak
you grab the dagger
run with me
into the receding tide
only when we’re alone
do the answers find us
gliding on the currents
bubbling up from the deep
swelling our lungs
until the words emerge
“i do”
but they’re seen
more than spoken
felt more than heard
we are authors at the typewriter
our story, still arcing
when we close our eyes
we see each other in the darkness
just before the morning light
i wake to be near you
peaceful, under blankets
your breath, rhythmic
radiating warmth
the slight silhouette
of your gentle curves
against the almost dawn
shakes me to reality
here, by you
you smile when you sleep
i like to imagine you’re dreaming of us
off in some distant future
arm in arm, seeing a new city
watching people as we go
but for now, i’ll savor you here
body next to body
soul beside soul
my best friend
my only lover
the one i’ve chosen
the one i’ll choose
the one who’s chosen me